Dear Carolyn • I have a favorite song that I sing to my 9-month-old daughter. I would like to discourage other family members from singing this special song to her. Is that a realistic thought? If so, how is the best way to handle it?
Dear Mom • Controlling, yes; realistic, no. The best way to handle it is to resolve not to try so hard to handle things. A song you sing to your child will become special because it is, not because you've decided it will be. There will never be a shortage of totems, symbols or special moments between a parent and a well-loved child. So you don't need to force the issue of your special place. In fact, in doing so you risk looking past the meaningful moments and mementos that your lives together will produce organically and, in this case, you also risk interfering with the crucial connections between these other family members and your daughter.