While I'm away, readers give the advice.
On sweating every little choice you make with a baby • I have a 6-month-old who is fun but challenging; I didn't get the "easy" baby that my mother told me I'd get. I desperately tried to get right with my totally reasonable decision to wean her at 3 months. My sister told me in the midst of one of my many early anxiety attacks: "All the things that are 'best' for baby are TINY fractions of a percentage point better than the 'second best' things. Family decisions are not made well on 'the best for her.' Instead they are made as a series of complex risk/benefit analyses that take into account the impact on everyone." Essentially, she granted me permission to be a family-centered parent, rather than a baby-centered parent and that really works for me. I've felt much calmer ever since. It was her modern, helpful, lovely way of telling me not to sweat the small stuff.
Calmer Than I Used to Be