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This weekend on TV: 'Crossbones' is violently boring

Published May 30, 2014 3:21 pm
This is an archived article that was published on sltrib.com in 2014, and information in the article may be outdated. It is provided only for personal research purposes and may not be reprinted.

Networks keep telling us they really, really want us to keep watching during the summer months. And they try to prove that by putting original programming on in June, July and August.

But "original" doesn't mean "good." And in the case of NBC's Crossbones (Friday, 9 p.m., Ch. 5), it's clear the network is dumping a bad show in the summer months because it didn't want to air it during the regular season.

The only thing more boring than Blackbeard (John Malkovich) in this pirate drama is the man the British navy sent to kill Blackbeard, English spy Tom Lowe (Richard Coyle). Zzzzzzzz ....



Lowe goes undercover in an attempt to retrieve some 18th-century technology, a storyline so unbelievably dull it's hard to pay attention.

The fact that there are various sword fights and a huge amount of violence - including torture and bloody killings - and this is still such a snooze makes "Crossbones" remarkable for all the wrong reasons.

Friday on TV ...

NBA playoffs (6:30 p.m., ESPN): Indiana Pacers at Miami Heat

Stanley Cup playoffs (6 p.m., NBCSN):Chicago Blackhawks at Los Angeles Kings

Continuum (8 p.m., Syfy): A group of students are commiting high-tech crimes.

this new series.

Saturday on TV ...

MLS (2 p.m., Ch. 30): Real Salt Lake at Seattle Sounders

NBA playoffs (6:30 p.m., TNT): San Antonio Spurs at Oklahoma City Thunder

Da Vinci's Demons (7, 8 and 10 p.m., Starz): The Ottomans are about to attack Italy.

2014 Rock and Roll Hall of Fame Induction Ceremony (6 and 9 p.m., HBO): This year's inductees are Cat Stevens, Daryl Hall and John Oates, Nirvana, KISS, Linda Ronstadt, Peter Gabriel, Andrew Loog Oldham, Brian Epstein and the E Street Band.

Bet OnYour Baby (7 p.m., ABC/Ch. 4): Season 2 of this harmless game show begins.

Orphan Black (7 and 10 p.m., BBC America): Someone threatens to expose the truth about Aynsley's death,

Sing Your Face Off (8 p.m., ABC/Ch. 4): New singing competition.

Sunday on TV ...

Stanley Cup playoffs (6 p.m., NBCSN):Los Angeles Kings at Chicago Blackhawks (if necessary)

Enlisted (6 p.m., Fox/Ch. 13): Pete's platoon battles Jill's platoon in a prank war.

Signed, Sealed, Delivered (6 and 9 p.m., Hallmark): Shane's old pal arrives and causes a commotion at work.

America's Secret D-Day Disaster (6 p.m., Smithsonian Channel): A live-fire rehearsal of the D-Day invasion of Normandy that ended in tragedy.

NBA playoffs (6:30 p.m., ESPN): Miami Heat at Indiana Pacers

Turn (7 and 9 p.m., AMC): Simcoe aggressively goes after rebel conspirators.

Drop Dead Diva (7 and 11 p.m., Lifetime): Grayson fights to return from heaven.

Believe (8 p.m., NBC/Ch. 5): Bo and Tate confront Skouras.

Halt and Catch Fire (8 and 10 p.m., AMC): Promising new series set in the dim, dark past at the dawn of the age of personal computers - the early 1980s.

Devious Maids (8 and 9 p.m., Lifetime): Marisol convinces Nicholas to get rid of Opal; Remi tries to win Valentina back.

Crisis (9 p.m., NBC/Ch. 5): Finley and Dunn make a startling discovery.

Food Network Star (10 p.m., Food Network): A dozen contestants compete in the Season 10 premiere.

Game of Thrones (10 p.m., HBO): There's a verdict in Tyrion's trial.

Silicon Valley (11 p.m., HBO): Jared plots a new direction for the company. (Season finale)

Veep (11:30 p.m., HBO): Selina prepares to debate her primary opponents.

 

 

 

 

 

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