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Fox is making another attempt to rip off CBS' "Survivor" — and the the result is a show you'd have to drag me "Kicking & Screaming" to watch again.

The only possible reason to watch this terrible show is to give yourself a new appreciation for the show it's trying to mimic. After 500 episodes, "Survivor" still sets the standard for reality/competition shows. From the casting to the editing to tweaking its own the format, nothing does it better — as Wednesday's 34th-season premiere proved.

"Kicking & Screaming" (Thursday, 8 p.m., Fox/Ch. 13) is not just a pale imitation of "Survivor," the first episode feels about as real as an episode of "Real Housewives" or "The Bachelor." Not just because it's contrived, but because the contestants are so clearly acting.

The conceit here is that "K&S" pairs 10 survivalists with 10 "pampered divas" — male and female — and they undertake various challenges in the jungle on a South Pacific island. The format, right down to the challenges, is a complete rip-off of "Survivor."

In that show, there are always contestants you root for and contestants you root against. But in "K&S," there's just a lot of unwatchable people with enormous egos who are preening for the cameras.

Hannah Simone ("New Girl") is the host, and she tries to channel her inner Jeff Probst. But the job isn't as easy as Probst makes it look, and Simone just seems cheesy.

I've seen four episodes — it's a dirty job, but somebody's got to do it — and Simone does improve. But the "Kicking & Screaming" is a waste of an hour of TV time that needs to be voted off the schedule as quickly as possible.