If you don't have a date, New Year's Eve is the longest holiday of the year. Even if you do have a date, "New Year's Eve" will feel like the longest movie of the year.
It's another collection of random and cliched romantic subplots, in the same vein as last year's inexplicable hit "Valentine's Day" which, like this one, was directed by veteran comedy guy Garry Marshall. The unifying symbol is the ball dropping in Times Square, and getting to that moment takes an eternity.
While I was watching "New Year's Eve," not laughing at the not-jokes and not responding to the non-chemistry between co-stars, I entertained myself by considering which coupling had the most disturbing age differential. Oddly enough, it's not the 29-year gap between Michelle Pfeiffer (53) and Zac Efron (24), but the 16-year space between Katherine Heigl (33) and Jon Bon Jovi (49). You know what they say: It's not the years, it's the mileage.