Here it is:
1. "That's My Boy" • Adam Sandler hits rock bottom, and then keeps digging, in a crass and joyless father-son comedy.
2. "The Three Stooges" • The Farrelly Brothers' love of the classic slapstick comedy doesn't translate in this shrill remake. (Sorry to Utah native Kirby Heyborne, who finally got a starring role.)
3. "The Apparition" • A horror movie so ineptly constructed, it was still trying to establish atmosphere during the closing credits.
4. "The Oogieloves in the Big Balloon Adventure" • A weirdly manic attempt to recreate some "Teletubbies" magic, but with zero charm or coherence.
5. "Fun Size" • Nickelodeon tries to make a PG-13 teen comedy, and fails to be comedic or teen-friendly.
6. "Last Ounce of Courage" • A heavy-handed, and dumbly written, right-wing diatribe against the so-called "War on Christmas." (Did anyone notice a lack of Christmas this week? Didn't think so.)
7. "Butter" • An even more dumbly written left-wing satire, set among the rubes of an Iowa butter-carving contest with Jennifer Garner wasted as a Sarah Palin-esque figure.
8. "Alex Cross" • Tyler Perry proves to be a bust as an action hero, in this sickening police procedural.
9. "For Greater Glory" • An overwrought epic tale of Catholic counter-revolutionaries in Mexico, which turns out more silly than inspiring.
10. "Parental Guidance" • Billy Crystal just needs to shut up for a minute. Please.