Jameis Winston, Heisman Trophy-winning quarterback, is truly a serious American man. After all, he and others on both the Florida State and Florida teams left the baseball bench on March 25, and went out onto the playing field, pushing and shoving to achieve glory ("FSU-Florida bench-clearing baseball brawl," Fox Sports, March 25).
Their aims were admirable. They raised arms to protect women and children from thieves and thugs in the city, to save American homes and lands from foreign attack, to ease the price of groceries, to demonstrate free speech and assembly, to promote democracy in the Ukraine, and to generally set a stellar example for the youth of the world.
They were about that sort of heroic thing ... weren't they? Apparently so, since the coach of Winston's Florida State team said the following about the game and its sideshow, according to Fox Sports: "Just very proud ... We certainly didn't back down from anything ... that's what we're about."